Sunday, February 19, 2012

The Other 84 Million Moms

I've been a little busy lately, so you'll have to forgive me for my apparent cave residency, but I only recently learned of the existence of One Million Moms. Someone I know posted a link to one of their "causes" on Facebook, so I took a look. (Mind you, my friend was commenting that this particular "cause" was a bit ridiculous, making it Facebook status-worthy.)

OMFG! Seriously? I generally don't trawl the Interwebs looking for groups of people who disagree with me, but since I happened to stumble upon them, I just can't help myself. If you happen to be unfamiliar with the group One Million Moms, as I was just a week ago, here is an excerpt from their FAQ page:

OneMillionMoms.com is an online project of the American Family Association... [that] exists to motivate and equip citizens to change the culture to reflect the Biblical truth.

OK. Now that I've stopped gagging, let me share some of my other favorite passages from their website:
  • "OneMillionMoms.com was begun to give moms an impact with the decision-makers and let them know we are upset with the messages they are sending our children and the values (or lack of them) they are pushing."You know what, I'm a mom, too. And yes, there is a LOT of stuff out there that I don't want my children exposed to. But you know what I do about it? I parent. I screen what my children watch on television, what video games they play, what movies they watch, and what they listen to on the radio. My oldest child is 5, so I have that luxury. And as he gets older, I am going to have to teach him how to make good choices. Because I know what's not going to work: railing against "the media" and "society" for putting bad choices out there for my kids to choose. Of course there are bad choices! There will always be bad choices. It's your job as a mom to teach your kids how to make the right choices. And yes, that can be very hard some days. It's also part of the job description of being a parent.
  • "How can I take action on something that offends me when OneMillionMoms doesn't address it?"This was on their FAQ page. And what a good question it is. How on earth could someone take action if OneMillionMoms is not addressing the issue? Heaven help us if we had to use our own little brains to figure out that we, ourselves, could contact a company that was promoting something that we found offensive.Crazy thought, I know.
  • "Our goal is to stop the exploitation of our children"
    Um... I've looked at some of the "causes" on your website. I would like to know how any of them are exploiting our children. Let's take a look, shall we...
Some of One Million Mom's causes:
  • JC Penney Offends Traditional Families Again
    OMM is upset that JCP chose Ellen Degeneres as their spokesperson. My word! An openly gay woman! ** now imagine me fanning myself with an invisible fan to prevent myself from fainting ** They go on to say that they're further upset with how JCP has been sending calls from their supporters to voicemail. This is, in their view, "tragic." Yes, tragic, that their supporters are being directed to voicemail to voice their bigotry and closemindedness instead of being able to do so to a real live person. No, OMM, tragic is the 16,000 children who die EVERY DAY from starvation. JCP not wasting an employee on listening to your intolerant views, not so much.

    Personally, I haven't shopped at a JC Penny in about 10 years. I will be making a point of doing so this week.

    I am wondering though, how does JCP choosing Ellen as their spokesperson "exploit children" exactly?
  • Macy's Continues to Offend Customers
    OMM is upset that on a recent catalog that Macy's distributed, there was a wedding registry ad that included (cover your children's eyes)... a cake topper with two grooms. ** gasp **

    Again, I have to ask, how does this exploit our children? Unless... oh no! You don't think Macy's is hoping that those two grooms are children, do you? Well if so, I'm with you OMM. I definitely do not want my son choosing his wedding cake topper until he is at least 18 years of age. But at that point, as long as the person he chooses to wed makes him happy until he is old and gray, I really could care less about his spouse's gender.
  • Family Dollar Stores - Christmas greed at its worst
    OMM was upset that Family Dollar chose to remain open on Christmas Day, thus causing their employees to have to work instead of being home with their families. Yeah, I get how that can suck. In my life I've worked a number of jobs that required me to work on Christmas Day, including working at a hospital and at a casino, neither of which close "for the holiday." Why on earth does OMM feel the need to single out Family Dollar for this travesty? You know how many people had to work on Christmas Day? I'm guessing the vast majority of them don't work at Family Dollar.

    Oh, and one last time, how exactly is this exploiting our children?
Ugh. I could go on, but what's the point. Clearly, I am not One Million Mom's target audience. But it does REALLY make me want to create my own website: TheOther84MillionMoms.com. You know, the rest of us all American moms that think the one million of you are ridiculous.